In Atomic Habits (which I highly recommend), James Clear says that none of us get up each morning and say to ourselves, “Today I plan to do the same stupid self-destructive things I did yesterday.” And yet many of us do.
We get up, we vow to not overeat or binge or buy those demon foods and yet we do. We go into the restaurant at lunch determined to eat a salad with dressing on the side and we order the burger and fries. We stop at the convenience store for one ice cream bar and we buy three 4-packs and eat six bars before bed. We go to sleep feeling sick, ashamed, and vowing to do something different the next day. And maybe we do but usually we don’t. The need for comfort is too strong.
Recovery from addictive behaviors requires many things. And while discipline and will-power are useful, they aren’t the key. And most of us know this. Some of us are highly disciplined and most of us are not lazy at all. We’re just looking for the answers in the wrong places.